This is part 42 of my SAO summary / fanfiction, and you can start from the beginning here.
Hey, everybody, it’s me, Kirito, the Man in Black, Savior of Aincrad, Wielder of the Tri-Blades, and one of the humblest men on Earth. Oh, I should also mention, ladies, I’ve maxed out my kissing skill. Anyway, today a new game is out, Sword Art Origin! Let’s log in!
“Hey, Asuna, Liz, Silica, how’s it going? Did you know? This is a new game, a new beta test, Sword Art: Origin.”
“Um, Kirito… we all just shelled out sixty bucks on this game, so maybe we know what this game is called. Just lay off with your mansplaining bullshit, you sexist pig.”
This is my good friend, Liz. She might sound a bit harsh, but that’s just how she is. That Liz. Such a flirt. She can make anyone crack a smile in their darkest moments. More than once we’ve entrusted our blades, and lives, to her. She was the first one who pounded on my blade to make it so erect and firm. She sure made me smile. I owe so much to her.
“Liz, did you know? This is like our old world, Aincrad, but instead of in a tower it’s on the ground, so it’s called Ainground. “Ground” in English means ground. These game devs are so clever. Almost as clever as me.
“@#%# off you #@%@#%^ #%@#$!!!!”
“Kirito, I’m a bit nervous… Remember last year, when we played Sword Art Online? How we couldn’t log out of the game, and if we died in the real world, we died in real life? Playing such a similar game again just brings back all the memories… I think I might wet my pants.”
This is Silica. I met Silica early in Sword Art Online when I saved her from a group of monsters, and worse.
“You’re right, Silica, those were some great memories… I miss those days.” She’d wet her pants back then too.
“But this place isn’t a prison anymore. No matter what’s in store for us here, we should be having fun. Together.”
“You’re right, Kirito. Although I enjoyed my time in prison, getting licked by that creepy guy… that was hot. I know you liked the NTR too. But tonight, let’s have some fun together at the inn with our daughter Yui. I heard that this game has an upgraded physics engine. Can’t wait to try it out.”
And this is my wife, Asuna. Just like me, she really loves swordplay. She’s the only one whose skills can match my strongest blade, with her well-oiled sheath.
“Kirito, my best pal!!!”
“Hey! Who were you again?”
“Haha, you always crack me up! But man, why do you get to hog all the cute chicks for yourself? Some of us are starving for attention over here!”
“Well, yeah, when you have sword skills like mine, what can you do?”
Imouto joined the group. “I’m so sorry Klein, about Freyja. I never would have guessed your first love would transform into a giant sweaty man with enormous two ton balls.”
“That was my second love, my first was Kirito when I thought he was a girl, but…. Wahhhhh!!!! Don’t remind me!!!!”
I wonder who that was. Well, whatever. This is my sister, Imouto. Since we’re family, we’ve practiced swordplay together in our house’s dojo ever since I could lift my sword. But swordplay with her got way better when we moved to the virtual world. The virtual world is so much better than the real world.
“Hey, Kirito… let’s go shopping together before we meet up with Yui for some swordplay at the inn.” Before anyone could stop us, Asuna grabbed my arm and ran off into the crowd.
On the way to the inn, Asuna stopped at the accessory stop. “Excuse me! I need some protective gear! Something with resistance to sword transmitted diseases (STDs). Plus I’m not ready to have another child.”
“Sure, this is what you need!” I looked at the shopkeeper closely. Her muscles were finely toned, almost like a kobold’s. With a bit of training, her swordplay could be quite formidable.
“Ki-ri-to!!!” Asuna yanked on my sword. “You’re holding hands with your wife, and you’re still thinking about swordplay with other girls?!!”
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m fine. I was just a little distracted by that shopkeeper. Anyways, let’s go to the inn.”
“Aaaah! Hi, everyone! Mommy, daddy, I missed you so much! I already registered and got our room keys. Let’s enjoy our family swordplay session!”
“YAY! We’re gonna be an awesome team again! Strea is back and cuter than ever!”
“Yeah! And… Who the flying fuck are you?” asked Asuna.
“What??!!! Mommy, you don’t remember? Strea is Yui’s little sister! We’re family!”
“Ki-ri-to?!!!! Care to explain?” asked Asuna as she brutally crushed the hilt of my sword with her bare hand.
“I… don’t… know… either,” I gasped. I looked closely at Strea’s two bucklers. She was well equipped for swordplay, and I could tell it would be some great practice. “But it’s ok. Yui’s family is our family, Asuna. If she’s Yui’s little sister, then I’ll be her daddy.”
“Daddy, I love you too!” cried Strea as she tackled me and squeezed my sword between her bucklers.
“Get off daddy, Strea, you’re making him turn all red!”
“Kirito, I’m going to fucking pulverize you tonight,” said Asuna.
“Darling, I love you too.”
“Daddy, mommy, I can’t wait to play Sword Art Origin! We get to have all sorts of family time here in Ainground too!”
To be continued…